5 Ways To Achieve Ultimate Self Confidence

Self-Advocacy

Self-Advocacy is generally defined as being when someone acts or speaks out for themselves, in a bid to effect personal change, correct imbalances or inequalities or to improve their quality of life. In more general terms, it’s simply about being able to articulate your needs and make decisions as to how best to meet your needs.

It appears some people are naturally better at doing this, doesn’t it? Well, that might be true, and if you aren’t naturally adept at advocating for yourself, don’t worry because you can learn how. There are five key areas of your life and it’s vital that you take an active role in each of them.

We are often guilty of letting life pass us by, but it’s impossible to be a passenger when you practice self-advocacy. Let’s look at each key area of life and how you can take an active role in improving your happiness and health. The change starts here.

Emotional Health

What does it really mean to be emotionally healthy? It means being in complete control over your feelings, behaviors, and thoughts. You can cope with the challenges that life throws in your way and despite that, you have no trouble keeping those issues in perspective. A setback is something that you bounce back from, rather than collapse under. You can maintain healthy relationships and you feel good about yourself.

What it doesn’t mean is that you’re going to be happy all the time, but you will be more aware of the emotions you experience. You are able to deal healthily with both negative and positive emotions. People who are emotionally healthy tend to deal with issues more effectively, but they will still experience sadness, stress, and anger. The difference lies in their ability to manage those feelings and understand when a problem is too much to deal with alone, when to reach out for help, and when a doctor’s advice is necessary.

If this doesn’t sound like you, don’t worry because it’s a skill that you can improve, and there are steps to get you there. Your emotional health is important, so if you want to realize your potential in life then you need to work to improve it. Not to mention, your emotional well-being can have an impact on your physical health, too. Research has long linked positivity and good overall health.

Take Notice Of Your Reactions And Emotions. Start being aware of the events in your life that are causing you to be frustrated, angry or sad. You can change those things, and if you can’t change them you can address them as best as possible.
Appropriate Expressions Of Emotions. A lot of us tend to bottle up our emotions and shove them aside. This isn’t an effective coping method and while it seems to take care of the problem short-term, it’s only creating more problems for you in the long run. Why? It just creates stress. So, learn how to express your emotions to the people around you. When you deal with it immediately, you avoid storing it up for one epic inappropriate blowout. This habit will improve your work and home lives, and the relationships you have with the people around you, too.
Think, Don’t React. Never react to something without giving yourself time to think about it. Your emotions are powerful and it’s vital that you take time to process them before you act.

Stress Management. Learning how to manage stress is an important part of your emotional health – there are a few ways you can deal with this. First, you can attempt to change the situations that cause you the most stress. If that’s not possible, you need to learn how to use relaxation methods. This can be exercise or meditation or even deep breathing (which is a great one to do at your desk when you feel your day spiraling out of control).
Strike A Balance. It’s important to strike a healthy balance in life, that means finding an appropriate split for work, play, rest, and activity. You should do everything you can to focus on the positives in your life.
Physical Health. If you drink too much, take drugs, eat unhealthily, never sleep or exercise then there’s every chance your lack of physical health can have an impact on your emotional health. Look after every aspect of your health, they’re all linked.
Social Connections. Humans are social beings, so support your emotional health by finding plenty of time to socialize with your friends and loved ones.
Positivity. Surround yourself with positive people, be grateful for the good things in life, and stop beating yourself up over mistakes – we all make them, learn how to forgive yourself, learn, and move on.
Purpose. Find your why in life and shift your focus to it, whether it’s volunteering, your career or your family. Do whatever it is that feels most meaningful to you.

You can still experience mental illness or emotional problems when you maintain your emotional health, it could be the result of a chemical imbalance or chronic stress you are unable to manage. There are plenty of ways you can deal with this, from support groups, medication, and counseling. If this is an ongoing problem in your life, speak to your primary care physician. Ask what you can do to improve your situation, if medication is right for you, if counseling would help, if your physical health is causing problems, and talk about stress management techniques that are right for you.

Mental Health

How can you take an active role in your mental health when your life is so hectic? You barely have time to sit down to eat, yet somehow you need to also lessen the blow when it comes to life’s typical wear and tear? It doesn’t have to be as complicated as it sounds.

Maintain Your Health. Your physical health plays an important role in every area of your life, so make sure you eat well, sleep, and exercise regularly.
Anger Release. Processing your emotions is integral to your mental health. It’s normal to experience anger and frustration, but it isn’t normal to allow those feelings to build up. Learn how to walk it off, even if that means venting. As tempting it is to hold on to old grudges and seek revenge, there’s nothing healthy about it. So, learn how to effectively deal with your anger and in healthy ways.
Active Brain. Boredom is the enemy of your brain, so you should constantly challenge it in order to avoid complacency. Read plenty, from poetry, fiction and literature, listen to music regularly (and mix it up on the genre front), complete crossword puzzles and brain teasers, learn a new language, and learn something new every day.
Awareness. It’s easy to get caught up in the negatives of an obstacle but look at difficult situations as a learning experience. Take new skills from the adversity you face.
Sense Stimulation. It isn’t enough to just keep your brain active, you also must stimulate your senses. Visit museums and take in stunning pieces of art, try new foods at every opportunity, and try listening to new music that you wouldn’t normally listen to.
Seek Joy. There’s nothing more important in life than finding a healthy balance. Your mental health relies on your ability to seek joy and find fun whenever you can. Work can be exhausting, but your mind needs time off that will distract it from stresses, so, head to the beach, go see a movie, take a walk through the park or go hiking.
Maintain Healthy Relationships. There is nothing more important than friends and family. They are your shoulder to cry on during the rough times, the people who make you laugh until tears pour from your eyes, and generally, are just great to be around. So, find more time to maintain the healthy relationships in your life (and if you have any toxic ones, it may be time to cut all ties).
Relaxation Techniques. Relaxation is important, but a lot of people struggle to fully disengage their brains even when practicing hobbies. So, learn how to meditate or practice yoga as a way to relieve your stress and increase your relaxation. Additionally, you may want to find a hobby that does allow you to fully disengage. What activity causes you to lose track of time completely? That’s the one to go with.
Enjoy The Moment. Life really is too short, so if you can’t find the time to savor life, make the time. Slow life down and enjoy it.

Social And Relationships

Does this ring a bell? You find yourself pushing your own needs to one side in order to look after the needs of everyone else. You run yourself into the ground to bend yourself backward to do this favor and run this errand to make someone else’s life easier.

It’s easy to be overrun in all of our relationships. It generally leads to resentment and a breakdown of the relationship, and that affects your overall happiness. What often happens in relationships (romantic and platonic) is that we are so focused on keeping them happy, we lose sight of our own happiness. We give in to things without a fight, and they have no idea what is happening inside. You can be a doormat without the other person expecting or demanding that you are, but when you don’t set boundaries you are inviting this upon yourself.

Set Boundaries and Stick To Them. It’s important to know your boundaries, express them, and then stick to them. If you explain your boundaries and then allow them to be constantly overrun, they are entirely useless. So, be firm. When you say no to people they may be disappointed, but they will soon realize that this is how it is now. You’re not saying no to be cruel or to punish people, you’re simply looking after yourself and improving relationships by creating equality.
Be Open and Honest. If you feel as though you’re being taken advantage of then speak up. If you are unhappy with certain things, then be open and honest about your discomfort. The other person can’t make important and necessary changes if they don’t know there’s a problem. Be clear, not cruel.
Create Time For Them. You can’t foster a healthy relationship if you are unable to make time for your loved ones. So, carve time out in your schedule for date night with your partner or a coffee catch up with your bestie. Everyone is busy and we all understand that, but you should always make time for your friends. It’s good for your mental and emotional health, too.

Spiritual Health

Your spiritual health could relate to your religiosity or just to your spirituality in general. We all have different beliefs and core values that guide us. Which means there are a variety of different ways to take an active role in your spiritual health. Here are some of the ways you may want to do that.

- Mindfulness. What is mindfulness really? It’s all about letting go of the stress your past brings and the worry you feel about the future and instead, living in the moment. In fact, it’s something that the world’s largest companies are using to help their employees relieve stress. There are many schools across America that are teaching children mindfulness meditation, too. There are a variety of different ways you can practice mindfulness, they include tai chi, yoga, and meditation to name a few. It’s something you need to practice regularly to reap the benefits.
- Journaling. Maintaining a diary is an excellent way to tune in to your emotions. You can express everything you are feeling in a safe, non-judgmental environment and from that, you can create a plan to keep yourself accountable for your spirituality.
- Practice Gratitude. It doesn’t really matter how you practice your spirituality or what your spirituality is, for that matter. Gratitude is key to each and every one of them. It isn’t just about finding a way to re-affirm your beliefs or finding pleasure in life’s simple things. It’s also about showing gratitude for what you have. There are a few ways you can do this, but one of the most effective ways is by keeping a list. This means you can look back on it when you’re struggling and add more to it as life gives more gifts. If you don’t want to keep a list, you can instead simply think about what it is you’re grateful for.
- Visit A Service. Regardless of your religion or affiliation, attending a relevant service can make all the difference to your spiritual health. If you don’t have any belief, then you can find a community online that gives support in much the same way as church does. After all, one of the greatest benefits of religion is the community that comes with it. If you do believe in a higher power, it may help you focus on your spirituality if you can focus on that and let go of the other problems that are nagging you. You should think of your spirituality as a commitment, to your future and to yourself. It simply means that you are willing to dedicate the necessary time to foster your well-being. It doesn’t matter how you incorporate it, it simply matters that you seek yours out with an open mind and that the main force driving yours is getting to know yourself better.

Career

Last, but not least, comes your career. The other areas of your life probably seem more complicated to take control of, but your career might be the most stubborn. You are beholden to an employer, caught up in competition to climb the ladder, and often feel stuck because you have bills to pay. So, how can you take the bull by the horns and practice self-advocacy in your career?

Development Plan. There’s nothing more impressive to employers than someone who is proactive in their development. So, make a plan that covers your main goals and if you are committed to your current employer, ensure that your goals align with the business strategy, as well as your experience, strengths, and interests. Create goals and a timeline for achieving them. You shouldn’t settle for the status quo if it doesn’t make you happy – and not every company offers appropriate guidance, so be prepared to develop yourself if you must. If you can’t get what you need in your current employment… it may be time to look elsewhere. It isn’t easy to make a change or undertake a new challenge, but taking a risk might be the most important step you make.
Find A Mentor. A mentor can make a major difference to your career development, it can help you improve your performance, clarify goals, and produce healthy working relationships. So, reach out to someone you feel would be a great mentor. You will find it can take you to the next level.
Build A Network. Look for opportunities, whether it’s a professional group of like-minded individuals or just getting drinks with your co-workers after work. You never know when those connections will come in handy. Sometimes it really is who you know and not what you know.
Seek Challenges. Be open to jumping outside of your comfort zone. You can’t grow and develop if you are stuck doing the same old thing, so don’t be afraid to take on a project that sits firmly outside of your comfort zone.
Earn Trust. It’s difficult to be happy in your job if you don’t feel as though your employer trusts you to get a job done. They should be role models in terms of behavioral expectations, but they don’t always do that. So, you should be. Check out your employer’s guidelines for behavior and align your behaviors with those guidelines as well as the core values and mission of the company. It gives you credibility and earns the trust of your employers and your colleagues, too.

Final Thoughts

It’s time for you to stand up to life and the people in it who take advantage of you. You are not simply a passenger on the raft of life, you are an active participant – at least, you should be. The entire purpose of self-advocacy is taking an active role in the story of your life and the paths that your journey takes. There are steps you can take and moves you can make in every aspect of your life that will result in the betterment of your life. Isn’t the whole purpose of life to live, love, and be happy?

We might not be able to control everything, but there are always choices to make and your happiness depends on it. You may find it helpful to create a master plan and cover each of the five key aspects of your life in it. It might sound over the top, but if you struggle with self-advocacy it might be the most effective way to learn how to help yourself. It can be as detailed (or not) as you prefer, and you can create bullet points or expand as much as you need to. Everyone should have a good idea of where they want their life to go and what will bring them happiness. A plan is a perfect way to ensure that it comes to fruition.

What’s important is that you understand how important it is for you to take control of what you can and make the right choices for you and your happiness and health. No one can put you in the corner unless you allow them to – so don’t let them.