Mastering Your Destiny-10 Practical Steps.
Introduction
There comes a time in every person’s life when they stop to wonder, “Am I doing enough?”
Sure, working a regular 9 to 5 job and spending your time working your way up in your career can be satisfying, but are sometimes the process of paying the bills can become tiresome and tedious, and you may find yourself wondering if you’ve lost sight of what is really important.
All of us have great talents and inspirations that drive us forward in life, but if we aren’t taking steps every day to help us to achieve our goals, our passion for life begins to dwindle.
It can be defeating to spend our lives working toward essentially nothing, stuck in the same monotonous routine while the things we really want to do with our lives are stuck on the back burner.
That’s no way to live, and many of us begin to feel stuck and confined as we wonder about the things that might have been, were we offered better opportunities, or had been able to make more time to work on the things that we find the most important to us.
Well there is no reason to wonder “what if?” any longer. Using this book as a guide, you will begin to see that it is not only possible, but essential, to master your destiny. Every one of us has a special purpose on this planet, and a singular life that belongs to us and us alone. Each of us has a duty to honor the purpose that we were meant to serve, and we are allowed to continue to create the changes that need made in order to make those dreams a reality.
What most of us are lacking is the basic structure to get to where we want to be.
Accomplishing our goals may seem obscure and idealistic, but there are steps that we can take every single day to get to where we want to be. It has never been more possible to become the best version of yourself you can possibly be, and by following the simple key steps in this book, before you know it you will be well on your way to mastering your destiny!
Let’s get started.
Know Thyself
The advice may seem tired, but the fact of the matter is that knowing yourself is a tried and true way of mastering your destiny. A person who doesn’t know themselves, inside and out, will not be capable of growing and changing in the ways that will help them to evolve as a person, because that person will likely be a slave to their vices without even knowing it!
Most of us have a hard time admitting our flaws and faults, even to ourselves. That gives them free reign over our lives, and a season pass to sabotage anything that we are working on. It is a sneaky way for us to get in our own ways without really being able to see the problem for what it is; an act of self-sabotage!
The most effective strategy in combating self-sabotage is to get to know yourself inside and out.
This may seem simple, but it is probably going to be a lot more complex than you might think. It’s more than just sitting down and listing the things you think you know about yourself, which is a good start. This is a time-intensive process that you will need to do with the help of friends and family whom you can trust to tell you the truth, whether it hurts your feelings or not.
But before we involve anyone else in the process of getting to know yourself, first you have to figure out just what it is that you already have covered.
One thing that may really help you is to take the Meyers-Briggs Personality test. Upon taking this test, you will find yourself placed in one of sixteen categories, and these categories each have a detailed profile that can help you understand more about yourself and the way you respond to certain situations and stimuli. This can also be useful in learning more about how you conduct yourself in relationships and as a part of a peer group, without having to rely on the feedback of your trusted friends and family.
These types of personality tests are also very insightful when it comes to the way one approaches their goals and whether or not they are realistic in the manner in which they attempt to achieve their dreams. Knowing your personality type may provide you with the insight you have been waiting for when it comes to which approach might work best for you in furthering your career or tackling the to-do list that has been put on the back burner for far too long.
Once you have a basic understanding of your personality type, you can begin to narrow your focus down onto what it is that you truly believe in.
Each of us have core values that provide us with the drive that spurns us onward. If we don’t know what it is that we truly believe in, then it can be hard for us to feel fulfilled and our lives can lack in passion and motivation.
But once we latch onto a core value that we truly feel passionate about, everything then begins to change. We can begin building a foundation for our lives and experiences based on these values; in a way that makes even the most mundane task begin to feel rewarding.
How might that be? Because we know that even the smallest task can accumulate to a major accomplishment. And when you are living a life that is true to your core values and beliefs, these major accomplishments are sure to be things that truly serve your life’s purpose. It is one of the most effective ways to make yourself feel like the master of your own destiny!
Many people simply don’t know themselves well enough to live a satisfying life, and this can be very sad. Whether it is a traumatic past that keeps you stuck, or it is simply a lack of self-knowledge or discipline, we all have to know who we are at the most fundamental level. Many people are so disconnected from themselves that they don’t even know what it is they like or don’t like. Now is the time to find these things out.
If you have a hard time with this, now is the time to trust your friends and family to help you see yourself objectively.
Ask them what they think your biggest pet peeves are, what you truly care about, and what it is you enjoy doing the most. Consider their opinions on your flaws and weaknesses, and vices that you might need to keep in check.
Remember that the fastest way to empowerment is in knowing your own weaknesses. Honesty about these weaknesses helps you to develop them so that they are no longer holding you back. Keep it up until you have been able to build them into strengths!
Goal:
Start a journal. In this journal, outline the things that make you who you are. Write down your self-perception in as much detail as possible. Take a test online to find out your Meyers-Briggs Personality type, and journal about any insights you might have learned from taking this test.
Every day, write about a strength in yourself you have used recently and how it is positively impacting your life. Also, write about a weakness in yourself that you have pinpointed, and what you are doing to address it and balance it out so that you are taking control over your vices and turning them into strengths! A person with power over their own faults is a true master of their own destiny.
Bend, Don’t Break
One thing that most people use as an excuse in giving up the control they need in their lives is other people. Other people get in the way.
Other people make demands on their time so that they aren’t able to achieve the things that they want to accomplish. Other people are responsible for the fact that they aren’t able to get their lives organized and really take the reins.
While it can be true that other people may pose interesting challenges when it comes to achieving our goals, the fact is that there is a difference between accommodating others and having healthy relationships versus bending over backwards to be a people pleaser and spending way too much time in doing so. People who master their destinies don’t do it by kissing ass. They do it by putting their goals as their top priority and achieving them by any means necessary!
This doesn’t necessarily mean putting other people on the back burner. The fact of the matter is that humans are social animals, and we survive and thrive in communities where we help each other to evolve and learn. We work with people who rely on us, and if they find that we are willing to compromise ourselves for them, they will put us to work until we reach our limits.
But many of us have a tendency to want to make everybody around us happy, and sometimes that means putting our own happiness on the line. It can seem impossible at times to please everybody around us, and the person who wants to focus on mastering their own destiny should take this as a lesson. It is impossible to make everybody happy. That is why it is most important to make sure that we are focusing on ourselves.
This is not selfish. Actually, it is quite the opposite. When you are in an airplane that is crashing out of the sky, you are more likely to be able to help your elderly seat-mate if you know to put your oxygen mask on first. When we don’t wear the oxygen mask, we can’t effectively help those around us, because we haven’t taken care of ourselves first.
This is a lesson that anybody with a tendency to people-please should keep in mind. If we don’t take care of ourselves, we will not provide ourselves with sufficient care. That can be dangerous and difficult for us to reconcile later, when we find we are so bogged down with the weight of other people’s problems and expectations that we no longer know who we are anymore.
The key to mastering your own destiny is in being able to let yourself have the freedom you need to say no. You can still be a social animal. You can still cohabitate with others and enjoy your team at work and achieve goals in a group setting. But the trick is in being able to set healthy boundaries so that you don’t end up feeling as if you are being taken advantage of.
Like the mighty reed, we need to bend, compromising only what truly needs compromised in order to succeed. We cannot break ourselves by taking on too much weight at once. Anybody who can step on us to serve themselves is likely to do just that. What we need to do is learn how to set healthy boundaries. And the first step in doing so is to put the oxygen mask on yourself and identify where in your life you could be more assertive.
This can be difficult, as balancing family and domestic matters can often be a difficult and messy task. In this case, it is best to sit down and have a mature and respectful conversation with your family members or roommates about what household expectations are and what is reasonable to expect from you considering your responsibilities.
Once a system is in place here, it is much easier to assert yourself. For example, if it is a roommates turn to do dishes, you can simply state it is so and refer to the agreement. This can be done assertively without any guilt on your part or temptation to simply buckle under the pressure of unmet duties that one might expect you to take onto yourself.
This is just one example of many. Being assertive may seem intimidating, but it is the most rewarding thing that you can do.
Being assertive requires a firm understanding of your own boundaries and limitations. Make sure that you think carefully about what it is you are willing to do, and what is too much for you. Be willing to be honest with those around you and stay firm when you tell them no. People respect a person with boundaries, and people pleasers usually end up very unhappy and aren’t always treated well. Setting boundaries will make it that much easier to master your domain once and for all!
Goal:
Sit down and write a list of things that you feel you do out of a people-pleasing habit. Address each of these ways with assertive but calm ways that you can respond to these situations and set a healthy boundary for yourself. For example, if you feel that a co-worker takes advantage of the way you pick up the slack for them, simply stop picking up the slack and let them know that you do not appreciate what they are doing. Practice communicating calmly and clearly without being accusatory, such as using “I” statements, so that others will be willing to accept your no for what it is and are less likely to perceive it as a personal attack.
How to Utilize Visualization
Many self-help Gurus of the 21st century will attest to the benefits of visualization. There is even science behind it. Our brains don’t always know the difference between something that is made up and something that is real. That can provide us with the power to turn dreams into a reality!
Our brains are powerhouses that are constantly working overtime to solve our problems and help us to achieve our goals. When we are sleeping, they are hard at work in an attempt to puzzle over the day’s events and try to make sense of them. Often, when we are least expecting it, we will have an “aha!” moment; a sudden epiphany or a burst of realization about how to handle a particular job or problem. Many people don’t realize that this happens because our brain is always attempting to make connections that will bring seemingly unrelated events into a cohesive whole of our conscious experience.
Because of the power of our brains, visualization can be a very effective technique when utilized correctly. Even athletes can utilize visualization when it comes to game play. The neurons in our brains are stimulated by imagining a scene playing out, and can help to prime our bodies to have the reactions that we want and need to have in order to operate at peak capacity.
Even if our goals are less physical and more conceptual, visualization has some incredible benefits. When we visualize a goal in our minds, it helps our brains to get focused on a new problem to solve. Whether we realize it or not, our minds begin to go to work in mulling the problem over and helping us to find easier and more direct ways to solve the problems that arise as a result of the planning process and to provide us with the drive and motivation that we need to succeed.
When we begin to see opportunities to advance our goal rather than consuming ourselves in doubt, achieving becomes inevitable. We want to solve the problems posed to us by the goal in question, and when we are able to truly envision what it is that we want, we are priming our minds to help us to map out a plan that will get us from point A to point B with the least fuss possible.
The greatest thing about visualization is that literally anybody can do it! All you really need to do is think about the goal you have and imagine what it would be like to live the life that you want most of all. When we imagine that we are living the life of our dreams, our brains are priming ourselves to follow a path that will provide those things to us.
There are two different types of visualization that can help you to work toward your goals. The first type is called “outcome visualization,” which is what most people think of when it comes to visualization.
Outcome visualization is when you think long and hard about the outcome you want out of any given situation and prime your brain to provide that outcome to you. Consider the mental image of your end goal and keep it in your mind for as long as you can. Come back to it every day so that your brain is primed on that image, and before you know it you will have a higher than average likelihood of seeing that image form into your reality.
The second type of visualization is called “process visualization,” and this is used by those who have a lofty goal in mind and who need to take the time to visualize the steps that need to be taken in order to see their goals come to fruition.
When you utilize process visualization, it is to help your mind to process the steps that you will need to take in order to achieve your goal. It makes it easier to break down big problems into manageable pieces so that before you know it, you can find yourself in a place you may have never believed possible.
There are scientific backings to the process of visualization, and if you are willing to utilize it for yourself, you will be that much closer to mastering your destiny!
Goal:
Sit down in a quiet room and close your eyes. Envision the future you want for yourself. Go into great detail about it, and hold the image in your mind for as long as you possibly can. Go back to this mental place as frequently as you are able to, at least once per day and maximum three times per day. Next, visualize the steps that it will take in order to achieve that ideal lifestyle and allow your mind to break those steps down into manageable pieces. Start with the first piece and move on as needed, visualizing a successful completion and considering the course of action needed in order to make those dreams a reality!
How Feeling and Looking Your Best Can Help You Achieve Your Dreams
Much of the time, we live our lives going from one task to the next, often putting ourselves and our health on the bottom of our list of priorities. This may seem convenient at the time during the hustle and bustle of daily life, but in the long run we begin to notice all of the ways that neglecting our health has actually harmed us.
Instead of allowing other situations and people to take priority over your time, make sure that you are putting yourself and your body first. When you are meeting your own most fundamental and basic needs, then you are bound to feel more confident and overall happier than you would be simply ignoring them.
When we spend too much time in our heads rather than nurturing a mind and body connection, it can become very overwhelming, whether we consciously realize it or not. Our minds become accustomed to ignoring our needs to the point that we experience burnout without even being able to pinpoint just what it is that we are burnt out from!
Not only that, but sometimes it can be so easy to just let ourselves go physically, and before we know it we are suffering from health problems and body issues that we had never experienced before. We don’t realize what harm we are doing to our bodies in the moment when we are sitting in bad positions all day or simply not getting enough nutrients or exercise. We don’t realize just how important it is to make an investment of time in our health!
Health and success may seem like they are not necessarily connected, and the truth is that maybe they shouldn’t be.
But unfortunately, there is a connection, and it is a rather significant one! When we are not tending to our health and fitness, our mind and concentration tend to suffer.
When our brains aren’t capable of operating and peak capacity, we not only miss opportunities that might help us to be successful in the ways that we are hoping to become successful, but we find ourselves wasting time by doing silly, unproductive things, such as zoning out or nurturing lazy and unhelpful habits.
Rather than encouraging ourselves to be the best we can possibly be in every possible way, if we are letting ourselves go in the arenas of health and well-being, then we are actively sabotaging our chances of being successful. When we are exercising regularly, we are actually enhancing the brain’s ability to think, concentrate, and create, allowing us the opportunities to truly excel in our day to day lives in ways that would not be possible if we are simply letting ourselves go.
Taking care of our bodies is important in other ways as well. For one, it is empowering. When we know that we are actively making great choices that help to improve our quality of life, it gives us a boost of confidence. Our self-esteem goes through the roof with endorphins and positive thoughts and feelings related to knowing that we are strong enough to make the hard choices when it comes to matters of health.
Not only that, but it is important in so many ways and for so many reasons that we are able and willing to really be honest with ourselves about what we do that is good for us and helpful, and what we do that is negative and unproductive. When we really force ourselves to take accountability for our actions, it becomes much easier for us to make the choices that actually serve us rather than sabotage us!
Fitness and exercise are things that many people struggle with, especially in a world like modern day North America
We are given flashy screens and conveniences out the wazoo, but that doesn’t mean that we should let ourselves give in to the temptations of lazy 21st century living. Truthfully, taking twenty minutes out of every day to focus on your health and exercise is all it really takes to ensure that you are on the path to the best you possible!
One thing that can help a lot is by having a steady morning routine that gets you really primed for the day ahead of you.
There is nothing more refreshing than waking up, and, after brushing your teeth and drinking a glass of water, stretching and exercising in front of an open window. Our bodies become acclimated to these types of routines and rejoice in being exposed to fresh air and healthy movement. It is easier to make time in the beginning of your day for yourself than it might be to try to squeeze something in later, knowing that your schedule can become unpredictable and chaotic the further in you get.
Try to remember that your personal success is directly related to how strong your mind and body connection is. Even just exercising three times a week can significantly improve your confidence and your outlook! There is science behind it, so try to make sure that you are doing what you can to stay focused on your physical fitness. Your brain and your body both will thank you!
Goal:
Wake up every morning and set aside time for yourself to stretch and “salute the sun” so to speak. Use this time to focus your energies on yourself and your own physical well-being. Write out a plan to exercise at least three times per week, doing things that you enjoy and that serve your body. Make sure that you are being kind to yourself and easy on your body, only pushing yourself to a degree that is healthy and not destructive. Exercising just three times a week can improve your blood flow and increase your ability to focus and create, ultimately providing you with a great tool in mastering your destiny.
Living a Life of No Excuses
All of us like to believe that we are always doing the best that we can. And in ways, that is true. However, it can be surprisingly common that we begin to go easy on ourselves and cut ourselves slack that we might not necessarily give to other people.
When we are overwhelmed or tired, it is easy for us to say that we simply are not capable of doing the things that bring us joy or that get us closer to achieving our goals. Our obligations and responsibilities toward our societal roles and family roles may seem like all we have time for.
There may even be times when we are down on ourselves about what we can reasonably expect to accomplish. We might not believe in ourselves or our abilities, and because of that we squander precious hours not doing the things we need to do in order to achieve our goals.
Part of this might be a lack of self-confidence, which can be addressed using the tools in this book. However, some of this tendency may actually be due to the fact that we are afraid of being successful. So afraid, that we might actually do things that will cause us to get in our own ways.
This might seem absurd, but have you ever felt a surge of fear when you were recognized for something you did well, or realized that you were good at something?
It’s like the moniker that with great power comes great responsibility. The truth is that we are aware that when we perform well at something, it puts pressure on us to continue to succeed, and other people begin to expect a certain level of performance from us. Whether our conscious mind can perceive it or not, it’s scary to be successful.
However, we have to be willing to face those fears head on and stop trying to convince ourselves that we are not capable of achieving our dreams.
Sure, maybe it is easier not to attempt it because then we can live our lives without being faced with a long road of trial and error and responsibility. It can be so much easier to give away our power in a whirlwind of self-doubt.
We make excuses not to succeed. We find reasons why it just isn’t possible to work toward our true passions. We allow those excuses to dictate our lives and convince us that we will never be good enough.
All of those things are dangerous. Especially when the truth is that each and every one of us has a higher potential that we can aspire to; a higher potential that deserves to be explored and nurtured, not shut down by the excuses we make to ourselves so that we don’t have to deal with the responsibilities of success.
If you are tired of getting in your own way, or of compromising for other people rather than steaming forward and focusing on your own passions and goals, then it is important for you to come up with a plan of action.
What are you going to do to stop yourself from making excuses that allow you to fail without taking any personal responsibility for it? What are you going to do to stop compromising your vision for the expectations of others?
Here are a few ideas.
First of all, begin to really examine yourself and your thoughts. Learn to recognize when you are cutting yourself too much slack and letting yourself off the hook.
The only way to truly become a master of your own destiny is to allow yourself to take responsibility for your future. If you fail, you have only yourself to blame. And that sort of blame really doesn’t feel good. When you look back on your life and find that you constantly made excuses not to achieve the things you truly care about, you will see that there were choices that you could have made to better your situation. You didn’t have to put others first at all times. You could have made time for yourself.
Instead of living a long life of regrets and living with a lack of fulfillment, take responsibility for yourself in the here and now
Practice mindfulness techniques that will provide you with a realistic interpretation of the events going on in your life. Take responsibility for every minute in your day and decide what is truly worth spending those extra moments on.
Sure, you have responsibilities and obligations, whether to your job or to your family, and those can be important.
But you are important too. And it is extra important to stop making excuses that allow you to let your life pass by before your eyes without you feeling the urgent need to step in and direct those minutes toward achieving your dreams!
Goal:
Journal about all of the self-defeating thoughts that you have during the day and come up with affirmations to counter those thoughts. If you find yourself thinking something like, “I’m not smart enough to figure that out and succeed at my dream job,” counter that thought with an affirmation such as “I am smart and capable, and I can achieve anything I set my mind to.” Do the same when you find yourself making excuses to take the easy way out. The easy road is not necessarily the right road to travel. If you want to master your destiny, make sure that you are taking care of your biggest obstacles, even if that includes yourself!
A Meditation Walk Through
To most people in today’s day and age, it can be hard to survive in the hectic lifestyle of business and social engagements and still have a chance to stop and smell the roses.
But when we are making so many demands on our time and on ourselves, it can make it impossible for us to find the inner peace and balance that is essential to our well-being in order to find happiness.
The stress of every day life can often feel insurmountable.
When we have to surrender so much of our time and energy to tasks that may not necessarily serve us, it can make it difficult to make the time we need to allow ourselves to process what is going on in our lives and provide ourselves with comfort, peace, and a sense of loyalty to our own needs and desires.
When we are disconnected from our own needs and desires, that can pose a serious problem.
If we aren’t honoring ourselves in every way possible, that can make it difficult to move forward in the direction that we choose; making it difficult to serve our goals and work toward achieving our purpose.
Fortunately, there are many ways that we can allow ourselves to surpass the barriers that we construct during our daily lives so that we can begin to get in touch with who we truly are and the things that we really want and need in order to be the best versions of ourselves possible.
Meditation has been utilized for thousands of years as a way to help us to get in touch with our inner selves and with the unshakable truths that we lock deep inside our unconscious minds.
Being able to tap into those things may seem divine to some, and practical to others. However you choose to view meditation, there are many benefits to it that surpass any bias you may have about it. Most people may be afraid to attempt meditation, thinking you have to contort yourself into an uncomfortable pretzel and try to listen to silence and stillness that seems impossible to maintain.
Most people have a very difficult time being able to sit still for long enough for meditation to make a difference.
Our culture is generally discouraging of time to oneself, considering it selfish or unnecessary or antisocial. However, spending time on reflecting on one’s life and circumstances may actually be one of the most necessary things one can do in order to master their destiny.
Meditation is actually easier than you might think.
It can be easy to believe that there simply is no time to allow yourself to process, though this can sometimes result in insomnia as all the thoughts of the day that had been forced into repression begin to surface just as you are allowing your mind to relax and drift into a sleep.
What most people don’t realize is that during meditation, it is actually okay and natural to experience your thoughts and feelings. The trick is in simply allowing them to exist and to experience them fully so that they are able to move on.
We quiet our bodies and minds so that what we are dealing with can be experienced in a more genuine and pure form, so that these impressions and thoughts will not contribute to us staying stuck.
When we are able to confront and face our thoughts and feelings, they no longer have as much power over us. And when we are able to truly begin to use meditation as a tool for self-exploration, it can provide us with insights that we may never have thought possible.
Meditation comes in many shapes and forms, and for people who have a hard time initiating meditation for themselves, it can be useful to seek out resources that can teach you more about how to use meditation.
Many websites offer videos and tutorials that will help to guide you in empowering meditation strategies. There are also books and CDs out there that can be useful in undergoing meditation for beginners who may not feel confident undertaking it on their own.
The first thing you need to do for meditation to work for you is to put down all of your pre-existing biases about it.
Meditation isn’t just something that weird hippies do in order to feel like everything is groovy. It is a useful tool that has helped to keep the mind and body aligned in the process of taking power over your actions and future. So get that thought out of your head if it is there.
You should also know that meditation is not hard.
In fact, it’s the total opposite of difficult. All you really have to do is to make sure that you are comfortable and relaxed, preferably in a quiet space where you can focus on your breathing and allow your thoughts to come and pass as they naturally would.
When you are in a relaxed state of mind, it is easier to see these thoughts and feelings in an objective way, and being objective to your own sensory input can provide you with deep insights about your body and your life.
For a beginner, meditation should be kept simple and comfortable.
Get a cushion or a pillow that is very comfortable for you to sit on. You could even lie back if that suits you better. Once you are sufficiently comfortable, you should close your eyes and allow yourself to get relaxed. This is similar to getting ready for sleep as you allow your breathing to happen naturally and effortlessly. Don’t get too caught up in not letting yourself have thoughts or emotions; the beginner’s meditation should be kept simple.
Once you are comfortable with the practice of relaxing and clearing your mind, allowing your breathing to come as an organic process and not something that you are too fixated on, then you may begin to feel more comfortable delving into other types of meditation techniques.
Meditation comes in many varieties, and if you are hoping to delve deeper into the meditation practice, then there are a few different directions that you could go in to do so.
Mindfulness meditation is one of the most popular forms of meditation, as mindfulness can be very helpful to anybody who is hoping to improve their life and feel more at peace.
To undertake a mindfulness meditation, begin with the first steps outlined above. Get comfortable and relaxed. Next, allow yourself to become aware of your chest rising and falling as it breathes, and the feelings at the tip of your fingers and toes as you sit there.
Contemplate the present moment and simply experience its wonder. The way your fan may be humming, or the sound of the birds chirping outside, or the soft feeling of the surface you’re sitting on. Allow yourself to take in all of the little things about the moment that you are in right at that moment. This is how you succeed at mindfulness meditation.
This type of meditation can be utilized for people who have a difficult time staying grounded, and has actually been found to be helpful for people who have experienced certain types of trauma as well.
It is a great way to help you to develop your mind and body connection if you find that it is something that you need to work on. You have to be fully aware of yourself before you can step into your dream vision. As mentioned before, nothing sabotages us quite as skillfully as we sabotage ourselves!
Another type of meditation is known commonly as concentration meditation.
To perform concentration meditations, you focus your full attention on one single thing whether that thing is a specific area in the room, or something physical like the way that you are breathing. This type of meditation is very useful in problem solving or in helping you to get your mind off of the things that are getting you down.
When you focus on a specific thought or problem for too long, it can cause a lot of strain on the mind. By directing your thoughts and attention elsewhere, you are giving your mind a chance to interrupt negative thought patterns and anxiety to allow yourself a chance to recharge.
If you are a beginner, don’t be too discouraged if it is hard for you to maintain your focus on the point that you have chosen for a long time. It takes a lot of practice to build up to maintaining your focus on a specific thing for a long period of time. Go ahead and go easy on yourself at first, starting in three-minute increments and gradually increasing that amount over time.
Concentration meditations help you to stay focused on one object or action so that it becomes easier for you to allow your thoughts to pass by you.
It may help to imagine your thinking as a wave that should be allowed to wash over you and pass by without sweeping you away in it.
They will come and go just like the tide, and when you are ready to return to them, you can. Until then, concentration meditations can provide you with a vantage point from which to view your thoughts objectively and gain insight into yourself and your life, providing you with a sense of empowerment that will truly grant you agency over your life and mastery over your dreams!
Goal:
Take time out every day, starting with a simple three to five minutes, to meditate. Find a quiet, calm place in your home where you can allow yourself to close your eyes and get comfortable. Begin by simply closing your eyes and allowing yourself to feel confident in creating a safe and comforting space for yourself. Once you are pleased with this arrangement, you can begin trying more advanced types of meditation. Begin with a simple concentration meditation, where you close your eyes and focus on your breathing and your breathing alone. Thoughts may come to the surface, and that is okay. Simply acknowledge that they are there, and allow them to go on their way without trying to cling onto them. Do this with all your thoughts for about three minutes, until you can open your eyes, take a deep breath, and feel refreshed.
You can alternate between mindfulness meditations and concentration meditations as well, by closing your eyes, or even keeping them open, and focusing on the present moment and all of the things you are feeling and experiencing at any given time. Mindfulness meditations can be done anywhere at any time, so feel free to use them if you aren’t feeling grounded!
Walking on Water
Sometimes it seems like the longer we spend daydreaming about our goals, the more out of reach they become.
It can be defeating to realize that what we want to do is going to require tremendous efforts on our part, and that effort may seem out of our league. These types of realizations can leave us feeling defeated and unmotivated, even before we have taken the first step in trying!
Defeatist attitudes are the fastest way to destroy our own happiness.
Sure, dreaming big is often discouraged because big dreams require a lot of work and a lot of resources, but that doesn’t mean that we can’t accomplish great things, even as a team of one person!
What it means is that we have to look outside of ourselves – beyond our brainwashed minds telling us that all we have in life are limitations, and realize that when we break the glass ceiling over our heads that keeps us trapped in our own discouragement, anything is possible!
However, for us to actually make any headway in achieving our goals, we have to do so with a practical and measured approach.
We hear all the time about the rare genius who was able to take an idea and turn it into a wildly successful reality.
We often view these people with awe and disbelief; as if they are larger than life and it is somehow a fluke or a strange event that had contributed to their success. We are all impressed by people who are able to go out there and achieve the goals that they set for themselves.
But what most of these people will tell you is that there is nothing all that special about them.
The reason they were able to accomplish their goals had less to do with opportunities and connections and networking, and everything to do with their own ability to plan ahead and see things through to the end.
Their goals were achieved because they had the secret to walking on water figured out. They knew how to break their goals down and work on them, bit by bit, until they were accomplished.
And that’s exactly what you have to do too.
It isn’t impossible to achieve your dreams. In fact, all it takes is some serious planning. Start out with looking at your end goal. Visualize it and write it out in detail so that you know exactly what it is that you are aiming for.
Go backwards from there.
For example, if your dream is to have a successful business, what is it that you have to do to get there? Well, for a business to be successful, you will need good clients. To have good clients, you will need a product and a service that they can trust.
To do that, you need to hire a good team that gets the job done and have a product that people are willing to pay for. For that type of product, you need to first get a patent on said product and have it developed and tested out first.
To do that, you need to research patents and brainstorm ideas for the types of products you would be interested in providing to consumers. And no matter where you are in the stages of your life and in developing your business model, you can definitely put a few hours aside per week to go toward research!
Start with the small aspects of your big plan and keep knocking them out of the park one by one.
Break the goal down into small, easy to digest pieces that are easier for you to understand and work toward accomplishing.
This is truly the key to being able to walk on water and achieve things that other people might think that it is impossible for you to do. Everybody wants to be able to do great things in life, but without understanding the nature of achieving goals and how to get from point A to point B, there is almost no point in even considering such goals.
You have to be willing to put the work and dedication into making sure that you have a blueprint to success all laid out and ready to go.
Don’t stress yourself out worrying about the big picture and feeling overwhelmed by the huge dream you want to reach. Instead, break that huge dream down into smaller dreams that ultimately come together to form the big picture. That is a simple and sure-fire way to getting your goals accomplished and turning your dreams into a reality!
Goal:
Instead of being overwhelmed by the amount of work needed to put into achieving a dream that looks too good to be true, try buying a notebook and writing down your goal. Think backwards about the steps that you have to take to achieve that goal and break the big ideal down into smaller goals that can be achieved over time. If you don’t want to go backward, that’s fine, you can also try to do it from the bottom up. Just do your best to make sure that you have the insight necessary to make the planning process a success. No matter how difficult it may seem to achieve your goals, it is nothing compared to the negativity we place on our own shoulders when we convince ourselves that what we want to accomplish is impossible, and too big for one single person to do
on their own! That’s not true. You can walk on water and create the reality of your choosing, simply by learning how to plan and break your goals down into manageable chunks!
Identifying and Avoiding Toxic People and Behaviors
No matter where you are at in life, whether you are already a successful person in your chosen field or if you are simply struggling to get your goals figured out, toxic people and situations are everywhere.
When we are unable to identify these toxic people and behaviors, it can be a huge issue, one that is extremely detrimental not only to our well-being, but to our future as well.
Toxic people do not want to see you succeed.
They want to bring you down to their level and convince you that you are incapable of doing the things that you set out to do.
They are so mired in negativity that the only way they think that they will be able to survive is to spread that negativity to others.
This gives them temporary relief from their own miserable lives, but it is never enough to make them truly happy. What they will do instead is come back and keep picking at you until they are satisfied that you will never accomplish anything good.
They do not want to believe that anything positive can happen, either to themselves or to others.
They do not want to see other people happy because it makes them bitter. They will often be manipulative people who are out to further their own agendas and work themselves into positions of power over others, because most toxic people see the world in terms of power and control.
They have a hard time getting along with others because they have a shallow ability for empathy.
These people can show up anywhere, and it is especially harmful if they are people that you already know and trust.
It may take years to identify toxic behaviors in the people that you care about, but once you do and you are given a break from their influence, you may find yourself feeling better than you have in years.
Toxic people and behaviors are dangerous to our mental health and well-being.
They make us doubt ourselves and put our self-worth into question over sometimes ridiculous things. It is hard for them to communicate in a healthy way and we may find ourselves being blamed for their mistakes, or being made to feel responsible for their emotional lives when in truth, only they are responsible for themselves and that is the way it will always remain, no matter how bitter they may be.
The reason toxic people are an issue when it comes to becoming the master of your own destiny is because toxic people often like to meddle where they don’t belong.
If they see that you are trying to make your life better, they will bring you down.
If they see that you are capable of things that they don’t think they themselves are capable of, they will belittle your achievements and talents in order to make themselves feel better and to prevent you from succeeding. If a toxic person is threatened by you in any way, then they will do whatever it takes to help themselves feel better again.
This can mean disaster to a person who is sensitive to the criticism of others, or who does not know how to identify toxic behaviors in other people and instead trusts those around them to be constructive and helpful and honest.
If you are able to identify any indication of toxic behaviors in someone else, avoid them. These are not people who will help you on your way to becoming the master of your destiny. They simply can’t, because they want to be the master of your destiny. You are better off without them.
Goal:
Become very familiar with toxic behaviors and learn how to identify toxic and manipulative people in your life. There are many resources that can help you to do so, and the more you know about these types of behaviors the better prepared you will be in the future when confronted with situations you may find yourself in with toxic characters. Journal about toxic behaviors you have seen and witnessed both in your own life and in movies or books. Also think honestly and critically about ways that you might also be toxic and behave in ways that are unhealthy toward other people as you attempt to accomplish your goals. Introspection can be difficult, but if you identify your negative behaviors and address them, then you are a true superhero. Once you have identified toxic behaviors in others, you can try to set firm boundaries with these people. If the boundaries you set are violated, it may be time to say good bye to the toxic person in your life once and for all.
Building Your Support Network
As with anything, a good support network is everything.
When it comes to empowering your life, it can be so difficult to find the resources that you need at times. The key that many successful people aren’t telling you is that they became successful because they surrounded themselves with other successful people.
Humans are social animals.
We are constantly taking cues from the people around us about how to behave. If we are surrounded by caring and generous people, we become more caring and generous ourselves, whether subconsciously or consciously.
When we are surrounded by negative, defeatist people all the time, then we start to become more negative and defeatist ourselves. This can have a huge impact on whether or not we are priming ourselves for success. When we’re not priming ourselves for success, we are priming ourselves for failure. It is that simple.
You should always think about the types of energy that your peer group is subjecting you to.
If they are a positive group, then you are going to be more prone to having positive thoughts and interactions, whether you are interacting with that group or not. If they are negative, you can expect that you will begin to act and feel more negatively as time wears on.
It is extremely important to ensure that you are giving yourself the chance to interact with other successful people.
When you surround yourself with people who are displaying the characteristics that you want to have yourself, it becomes easier for you to develop those characteristics simply by spending time with those people.
They rub off on you in a most wonderful way, priming you to succeed in the ways you hope to succeed simply by being achievers.
Of course, it’s not the only thing you have to do to be a successful person, and it also helps to have a support network of friends and family that are completely supportive of you and who you can hold yourself accountable to.
When you are talking to people about your plans and they are asking questions about how you are doing and how things are coming along, you become more motivated to get to work and make sure that you are not letting them down.
Having people that hold us accountable to achieving our goals may seem cringe-worthy to those of us who are used to being a lower grade version of ourselves – especially if we are used to making plans and not following through with them.
But by following the advice in this book, you will be well on your way to taking the steps that need taken in order for you to be the best version of yourself possible and to provide yourself with the confidence you need to believe that mastering your destiny is possible.
Goal:
Make a list of the people in your life who are do-ers and achievers. The people you know will support you no matter what and hold you accountable for achieving your goals. If you haven’t told them about your plans and goals yet, you should make it a priority to do so, and let them know that you would appreciate their support in this new and exciting venture in your life!
Putting it All Together to Master Your Destiny
Becoming the master of your destiny has never been so simple.
What it really comes down to is becoming a disciplined individual who is able to hold down a daily routine that helps you to work toward your goals. With a good routine, anything is possible!
Every chapter here has been written to outline something that you can use to utilize your passions and become the best version of yourself possible. The best way for you to become the master of your destiny is to become a master of discipline.
Routine may seem boring and unnecessary, but the fact is that the most successful people in the world follow a strict schedule.
They manage to make the most out of their time because they know what their time is worth. By learning great time management skills and setting the time aside that they need daily to further their goals.
You can bring the spark of your passion forward with every step you take forward in your day. Structure is the key to success, and if you are able to utilize it in your life, you will have no excuse not to master your destiny.
The best way to begin is by examining what you want to accomplish and carving out the time to do so. What is your week going to look like? What about your month?
Making large end-goals to work toward can make it easier to break those goals into smaller pieces, ultimately providing yourself with a good framework with which to get things done.
But don’t just make a mental note about what you want to do. You’re going to want to make sure that you are putting down your goals and scheduling your day, week, and month into a calendar. Writing down your goals makes it more likely for you to follow through on them. Not only that, but it is a physical reminder for you to stay on track and get focused!
It’s important to understand that sometimes, life simply gets in the way of structures and plans, but that doesn’t mean that you should give up on structure altogether. Instead of getting discouraged when you aren’t able to follow through on your goals for the day, maybe determine exactly what it was that caused the hold up and make a note of it so that you can do better next time. Simply reschedule the goal that you weren’t able to follow through on so you can get it done later. Never give up!
It is only when you stop trying that you give up your power. But with a resolve of steel and the structure to get you there, there will be no stopping you from becoming the master of your own destiny!
Goal:
At the end of the month, sit down and envision where you want to be at the end of the month that is approaching. Write out daily, weekly, and monthly goals on a calendar that you will have regular access to. Do the same thing at the beginning of each week, especially if you are still trying to get in the habit of having a structured daily routine. Having a foundation to work from will make it that much easier for you to achieve your dreams and become the master of your destiny!
Conclusion
Every single one of us has a vision for our future that we would like to turn into a reality.
No matter what those goals might be, there are several steps in common that anybody can take to make it possible to achieve those goals and make our dreams of the future into something tangible.
We are all capable of taking the steps that we need to take in order to become the best versions of ourselves possible.
Although it can be a challenge, there is nothing that a dedication to our own self-improvement can’t solve. Every improvement, no matter how incremental, can help us to move mountains and achieve things we may never have believed possible before.
If you want to become the master of your destiny, by following this advice, you will find yourself well on the way to accomplishing the goals that you may have been too afraid to pursue before your awakening.
It is more than just possible to accomplish your goals; it is vital. We were each born with a special purpose, with talents and passions that were finely tuned to creating a better world and a happy life. If wearen’t doing everything in our power to see those passions translate into our reality, then the truth is that we are not only robbing ourselves, but we are robbing the rest of the world of the beauty that only we can bring into the world.
Fortunately, if you have made it this far into the book, then you will know by now that you are more than capable of mastering your destiny. Taking the steps you need to take to be the best version of yourself will completely change your life. All you have to do is believe it.
Get your downloadable PDF of this post HERE